Welcome to Canada Eh
by Aranthi-Evenstar
Summary: Modern Canada is definitely no place for three Feudal era demons. What kind of trouble will they get themselves into? Can Kate and I keep them out of it?
1. Unexpected Guests

**A/N: So, I don't know if any of you actually remember this story or not. After much debating and convincing though, I decided I'd take down the old one and revamp it because my writing style has changed a lot since I started this. So here is the new, revamped version of the story! Please Review if you're reading it, because if people aren't reading it, I'm just going to pull it off all together. -nod-**

_**Disclaimer: I do not own InuYasha, or any of the characters. I do however own Katie...**_

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Everyone dreams of some kind of adventure. I know that I have, ever since I can remember. Sometimes though, we're not ready for what happens to come. This is what happened to me, but I learned that sometimes you just have to make the best of whatever happens. Everyone _thinks_ they want they want to go through an experience like this, but when facing it, they may find that it's not all it's cracked up to be.

I remember it clearly. It was a beautiful summer day. The sun hadn't yet gotten too hot, and everything seemed to be going pretty well. I was lying in bed, sound asleep. That wasn't going to last long for me, it never did. I could hear a quiet whining, and opened my eyes with a bit of a groan. "Mocha, shhh." It was my seven year old Shih Tzu, who always woke me up at untimely hours because he felt the need to pee. He wouldn't stop until he got what he wanted, so I pulled myself out of bed in a rather sluggish motion, and pushed open the door for him.

Once the door was open, I was greeted by my younger dog, a two year old malamute cross. He got to stay outside at night, to keep the deer and bear away from my house. Those were probably the least of my worries right now.

After both of them came in, they settled on the floor in my room. Quickly, I showered, and then got dressed. I could hear them both barking again, and rolled my eyes. "Come on you guys..." I came out of the bathroom, wet hair dripping everywhere. They seemed to be rather fixated on the door, and Duke, the bigger one was snarling at it.

Any smart girl would probably get worried, and distance themselves as much as possible from the door, but I didn't seem to have that much sense. After a deep breath, and some mental preparation I pushed the door open.

Needless to say, the sight that greeted me was absolutely shocking. Nobody expects these things to actually happen to them and I just stood there, staring at the males now in my yard.

Most girls my age most likely would have gone ahead and glomped them, but I, unlike earlier was a bit more sensible than that. Doing such a thing would probably result in quick decapitation, or slow, painful torture. Neither of which were things I was particularly eager to endure.

I knew who they were, but I didn't know _why_ they had come here. Can't say I wanted guests, I was quite enjoying the house to myself while my parents were gone.

The man with silvery dog ears was the first to speak. "You, girl, where are we?!" He never did seem to have to have trouble finding his voice no matter what the situation, though finding manners was a different matter for him entirely.

Right now I was fully aware I was standing there gaping like a fish cast from a pond, but his voice seemed to draw me from that state somewhat. Now I needed to find my voice, which was taking me a bit more effort than usual. It came though, and with boldness at that. "First of all, my name is Aranthi, not _girl._" I paused, taking a breath. I should maybe shut up and let the stubborn hanyou address me anyway he deemed fit, but I had dignity to defend too, right? "And, you're in Canada, home of ridiculously small towns, which have nothing in them." Well... at least he hadn't ended up in Alberta!

My dogs however didn't have the sense that I did to stay away from the two new arrivals. Mocha was sniffing at InuYasha's feet, and Duke was trying to jump on Sesshoumaru. It didn't take long for the sound of two whimpers to ring through the air, and the dogs to go running. With a sigh I rolled my eyes, folding my arms and narrowing my eyes at InuYasha, and Sesshoumaru. "Rule one; you have to be nice to them."

InuYasha looked rather pissed off at that, and let out a very dog-like growl. "Don't tell me what to do you little runt!"

I had never been a very big girl, but I never liked it being pointed out and he got an incredibly dirty look. "Just shut up and go inside." In response I got incredibly dirty looks, but both did what they were told, and I closed the door.

"You guys can sit on the floor." I didn't have any chairs in my room. I got an unsatisfied look from Sesshoumaru and sighed. "Or on the bed..." I grumbled under my breath. Mom would kill me right now; I wasn't supposed to have males of any kind in my room. Oh well...

Sesshoumaru sat on the bed, picking up a stuffed Pikachu in a scrutinizing way, then tossing it to the side. InuYasha was wandering around the room, sniffing at various things. "Are you a witch?" He finally asked, looking to me.

Great, first I was girl, then runt, now witch. "No, why?" I questioned, not really caring.

The male pointed to a small wire cage, watching it curiously. "You have caged rodents."

"Oh, they're pets, Haro and Neo." I replied after a moment of hesitation. "Here..." I walked over to the cage, and opened the door, pulling one of them out. "This is Neo; would you like to hold him?"

InuYasha just stared at me for a moment. "What kind of name is Neo?" He questioned, reaching out a finger a bit hesitantly to see the mouse.

"He's named after Neo Roanoke from Gundam SEED, he's big, blonde, and tries to screw anything that comes near him." It was, unfortunately rather true. I smiled a little bit when he put out his hand and put the little mouse in the palm of it. Neo just sort of sat there, staring up at the hanyou. "Watch he doesn't go up your shirt... or you'll never get it out."

InuYasha didn't get the Neo joke, and didn't seem to know I wasn't serious about him never coming out of his clothing, and threw him back at me rather worriedly. "I didn't mean- Oh never mind." Shaking my head I put the mouse back in the cage. Now the dogs were barking again, though! That was no good. Oh, I could hear someone. "Both of you stay here, don't leave my room for any reason!"

Could I trust them? No, probably not. I should have locked the door so they couldn't move, but I wasn't thinking about that right now. Who the heck was at the door?!

I took in a deep breath when I got to the door and pulled it open. Needless to say, I was shocked when I saw who was there. Oh no, not _her._


	2. Unwanted Guest

**A/N First I'd like to address my old reader, well, one of which who I know is out there, and others which... might be and I just don't know. I love you all. XD**

**I acknowledge the last chapter wasn't **_**that**_** funny. But, hopefully you remember that things start picking up more once Kate gets into the story. I'm going to try and keep it as funny as I can, because that's the point of the story, but I also am striving to keep it more in character this time, which adds a bit more of a challenge. XD**

**Anyways, lots of love to everyone that's reading this. I hope you enjoy it. 3 **

**Also, I apologize if I'm inaccurate on things; I haven't actually watched InuYasha in quite a while. **

**As a bit of a side-note, I'd like to remind you I have absolutely nothing at all against gays, in fact, I believe my dogs are... Anyways, the point is that I don't mean to insult anyone.**

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Right now I didn't know what I was more annoyed with; Sesshoumaru and InuYasha alone in my room or _her_ standing in my doorway. At this point, I was ready to shut the door, and just walk away. Don't get me wrong, she was one of my best friends and everything but she never calls me, e-mails me, or visits, and now she was standing on my doorstep. Well, now I guess it's unfair to say that she never visits. Still, I didn't want to be dealing with her right now. "Kate, _why_ are you here?" You would think I'd be happier to see her, but right now, it was just inconvenient.

For what seemed like an hour she just stood there with a very vacant expression on her face. Kate wasn't even looking at me; she was staring at the wall _behind_ me. After a moment though, my question seemed to click in that wonderful little brain of hers. "Oh, my parents dropped me on the side of the road again, randomly, so... I thought I'd come here!" The girl was about the perfect contrast to me, happy, hyper, and... Well Kate was just downright weird.

"You can't be here now; Mocha and Duke have some friends over." So neither of the dogs actually liked the new visitors, but I really didn't want her here.

At that point she looked incredibly excited. "Are they having a coming out party?!" She had thought they needed one for quite a while now.

An exasperated sigh escaped from me and I shook my head. "They're not _gay_ poor Mocha is just a little confused."

"Is there puppies?! I want to see, I want- want-" Oh, that girl _never_ shut up! "Puppies! I want to see the puppies!" Apparently she had reverted back to the mindset of a two-year-old. I shouldn't say reverted, because I don't think she actually ever left that mindset. "Oh, that reminds me..." She pulled out a necklace, which was very similar to InuYasha's and rather ineloquently flung it at me. "I found that for you!"

"How do puppies remind you of...?" I looked down at the necklace, thinking about it for a moment. Actually, that could come in really handy. "Thanks Kate."

Now... she was staring past me again. This time it wasn't at the wall though. Apparently Sesshoumaru was too good to do what I told him and stay in my room on the bed. That of course meant that InuYasha had to come too, because heaven forbid his brother got all the fun. Kate had spotted him and was looking at him with big eyes. "Ara... who's the gay guy?!"

Sesshoumaru seemed to be slightly intrigued, but still looked... rather stoic. At this point I was wondering if his face would shatter, if he showed any kind of emotion. It was quite possible. We'd have to figure out the science behind it later on, maybe even test the theory. "Go jump in a closet." Was my annoyed grumble, was this really happening?

"Right, because he totally needs to come out." Kate spoke in a rather cheerful tone, staring at the two of us.

Poor Sesshoumaru looked rather annoyed that he was incapable of following this conversation. Maybe he thought his intelligence or dignity was threatened, the poor guy just didn't understand more modern day expressions. That might be in our best interest though, he might not take well to it being suggested he had a thing for other men.

"You just think everything is gay, don't you?" I sounded rather annoyed as I watched InuYasha, Sesshoumaru, and Kate. What trouble would they all get themselves into? Kate wasn't exactly the best influence.

"No, only your dogs, and those two guys..." Kate spoke in a rather matter-of-fact tone, like a four year old trying to make a point. "Are they together?! That's so cute!"

Was there even a point in explaining this? "No, they're brothers. That would be twisted incest."

"What are you two talking about?!" It was strange for InuYasha to be quiet that long and you would think he would have spoken up sooner. He walked over to Katie, and was now sniffing her in a very doggish way. Sesshoumaru on the other hand was looking at the three of us like a wolf stalking a bunny.

"Kate, I think you should take the dogs for a walk." I really wanted to get things sorted with InuYasha and Sesshoumaru before dealing with her too.

Katie looked _incredibly_ excited with the suggestion and bounded over to InuYasha, nearly tackling him to the ground. "I don't see a collar! Is he licensed? You're going to get arrested Aranthi!"

InuYasha looked rather annoyed to have someone clinging off of him like that, and it didn't take long for Kate to be shoved back out the door. Well, that was the most useful thing InuYasha had done since he got here, and I quickly slammed the door, locking it.

"I'm out of here!" InuYasha announced.

"You don't want to do that!" Now I needed... a reason.

"Why not?!" This was going to turn into a yelling match if we weren't careful.

"Because _she's_ out there." That was a good reason, right?

He seemed to think that was good enough and quickly went to sit on the couch that was across from the one Sesshoumaru was in.

"Okay, now..." I took in a deep breath, standing against the window, staring at them both. "I don't know how either of you got here, but, there's some things we need to go over." I murmured, not sure where to start. There was a loud thud behind me and I jumped, turning around. There was Kate, on the deck with her face pressed against the glass of our French Doors, staring into the living room. With one fluid motion I drew the curtains shut and turned my attention back to the males. Both of them now were standing up with swords drawn at each other.

Was there even a point in trying to stop them? There was a blur in front of me, and soon enough Kate was latched onto InuYasha again.

"How... did you get back in here?!" That girl couldn't take a hint, could she? I didn't _want_ her!

"Your brother left the window in the bathroom open!" She sounded proud of herself, and InuYasha looked ready to kill her.

Getting everything worked out wasn't going to be easy.


	3. Annoying Guests

There are few people in this world that are scarier than I am, when angered. Unfortunately for us, Sesshoumaru and InuYasha are two of those people. Both of them were also stubborn and prideful, which were more clashing characteristics. Needless to say, calming InuYasha down enough that he didn't want to brutally slaughter Kate took a lot of effort. It was night time now, and we were all downstairs.

The hide-a-bed had been pulled out, and there were two mattresses on either side of it. I was on the bed with Kate, and InuYasha was separated from Sesshoumaru by the bed. You would _think_ that meant quiet, but that wasn't really the case. InuYasha was into a lot of things, and I was wishing he'd just shut up and go to sleep. Maybe when I woke up in the morning they'd be gone? Was that too much wishful thinking? Well, it wasn't so bad right now. Kate was at this point trying to explain the concept of a show to InuYasha, but seemingly failing.

I wasn't even fortunate enough that they had the mentality of children. Maturity level, perhaps, but not mentality. Simply put – they were like having overly intelligent children in a grocery store. They knew what they wanted, and by the time you were at the checkout you had what they wanted because they either wore you down so much with whining you didn't care anymore, or _somehow_ tricked you into thinking it was a good idea.

Star Trek was never something I took much interest in, I never liked space movies. ET still scares the life out of me. There was only so much of this I could manage. "I'm going upstairs." It was getting late, I was tired! Now... everyone was staring at me. At this point I couldn't help but wonder why it was _them_ I was stuck with. Why not Athrun Zala? Edward Elric would probably be easier to manage. "Is there... a problem with that?"

It took me a moment to realize... I wasn't the one they were staring at.

I have a couple dogs, and the bigger of the two, Duke, had wandered down the stairs. After sniffing the TV, he proceeded to mark it as his. "I'm not... cleaning that up." Kate mumbled, still rather focused on her show. She was probably more frustrated the animal was in her way, blocking her view, than concerned he just pissed all over the television set.

"Duke no! Sit!" That was when a rather loud crash drew everyone's attention elsewhere.

The hanyou that we all knew, and loved, had gone crashing down into the cement floor with a horrified yell. Duke however, was proceeding to mark the rest of the basement.

"Did you kill him?" Kate spoke curiously, looking at the still face-down male. "Can I.... have his ears? I'm making a teddy bear." The other girl was moving forward, obviously ready to examine the ears.

I had always known my friend was a bit twisted, but that was... a bit much. "I won't have you dismembering other guests in the house."

"Well... if I take him outside can I?"

"What? No!"

"Why not?"

"Just no!"

"Just give me a reason..." As she spoke she pulled out a small pocket knife.

"If you died, would you like me ripping you apart?" I couldn't believe we were having this conversation.

"Sure."

Both of us... probably should have been paying more attention to the full blood, looking down at his brother. "You wench. Killing him was supposed to be _my_ job. Now what am I supposed to do?" At the best of times he didn't sound warm and fuzzy, but that was in all... pretty scary.

"Take up knitting?" Kate had... never been particularly tactful, or one to think before she spoke. "Become a male stripper? Learn to sing?"

"Will you shut up!?" InuYasha had apparently recovered from whatever was wrong with him, and was standing behind Kate.

It looked like... nobody was going to be sleeping tonight after all.

.x.x.x.x.x.

Sorry guys, know that wasn't as funny as the other chapters. Its been a while though, and I just wanted to get _something_ added onto it. Next bits shall be funnier.


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